Sometimes I feel like life is moving 200 mph and I'm too afraid to reach out of the car and try to grab something familiar to hold onto that'll help me slow down. It's all chaotic, I can't recognize my friends. Hell, I can't even recognize who I am and what I've become. I'm just kind of there.
Other times, I'm at a comfortable 25 mph. Slow enough to get in and out of the car, but fast enough to where if I want to get somewhere, I can take my time and make sure I don't fuck everything up.
Today was a 25 mph kind of day. I got a 94% on my Huck Finn test. This is monumental. This is the greatest part about taking killer notes, too. We were going through the box in English that holds all of our grades, (Tara, Allison M. and Allison S.) and each grade that I got for Vocab and Spelling was a D or an F. I should not be getting D's and F's in English...I was in Honors last year, dammit. So towards the end of flex I noticed that Ondrof was grading tests, and he said, "Shannon, you're 520...right?" I nodded. "Here," he handed me the test. Fucking 94% written on the top. "Good job," he smiled. He knew how hard I busted my ass to do good on that tests. I hate taking tests, I usually bomb them. And he knows that. He knew how much that meant to me, and it fucking brightened my day like you wouldn't believe.
In Photography Anthony was reading Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire (Number 4) and he got to the part when the person dies, it was adorable...he had no idea that the person was dying. His face was priceless, I wish Meredith could've seen it. She would've loved it.
Then in Journalism, all I wanted to do was go to the computer lab and go on D-Land, so I did. Elise saw me and now she has her own diary! Ta-da! Go visit her, I love her.
I babysat for Jonas and Alex. All Jonas wanted to do was watch The Wiggles (How fuckin' disturbing are they!) and tell me about Spiderman and all Alex wanted to do was talk about her favorite Disney Princesses and show me her room. *sigh*
Then, I went to Zack's. And slept. And it was the cutest thing in the fucking world. We were both passed out on his couch watching Joe's Apartment. It was exactly what I needed, too. He's exactly what I need.
Because without him...I feel like I'm going 200 mph again. And I just can't handle that shit right now.
