*I'm talking about nothing important, continue if you're as bored as me right now*
I'm really pale. I mean really...I had a good system going a while ago, every other day I'd tan for 10 minutes, but that flew out the window. It's like 80 degrees outside, and the more I sit here in this airconditioned house staring at the hot hot sun the more I think "Why aren't I tanning right now?" Zack likes me pale. Of course he does, I don't think he'd change anything about me if he could...and that's so reassuring, because here I am and I could name 5 things I'd change about me in a heart beat. Everyone's going to prom, and I'm sorry but I don't see the big deal about it. I'll probably go when I'm a senior, but doubt I will next year. I'm just not motivated, and homecoming always sucks...they really need to do something about that.
I forget who i was talking to, it was probably Brandie...I'm always talking to her lately, anywho...we were talking and I said something about my being insecure. Note: I'm one of the most insecure people in the world...self-concious, you name it, anything to do with something along those lines is me. And we were talking about that and I said that I didn't feel so insecure all of the time and how I hadn't really paid attention to that until lately. She thought that was good because she knows how bad I am about that. She was happy for me, she knows how it feels to be self-concious though. We're talking a lot lately, and yes a lot of it's about Zack but not all of it. We know that we're best friends, we realized that a while ago. But...we're not as close as Emily and I, or her and Heather, but what difference does that make? We're best friends and that's all there is to it.
Yet again my Mom hasnt said anything about therapy, I hate to be the one always to bring it up, I feel weird talking to her about it. I found papers that my counselor sent to her. The same counselor that wouldn't recognize me if I walked into her office this minute. The same counselor who I've spoken to all of two times this entire year. They're such bullshit, it's not funny.
Yet another weekend where I'm not seeing my dad, and this isn't a weekend when I normally see him, but still. It's been too long and I'm starting to feel guilty about it all. I shouldn't ,I know that, it's not like he's ever going to leave, but nonetheless I'm feeling guilty about it. Me and Tiana were laughing like crazy today, of course we were...that's all we do in school, and out of it. I know that ever summer I say that I'm going to keep in touch with people and not only Emily, but this summer I actually mean it. People like Tiana and Brandie and other peeples I don't feel like naming I end up missing by the end of the summer then regret not hanging out with them...dammit. Lol.
Well, I think I'm acutally going to go tan. =) Lata!
