I'm so paranoid about it, and I won't even tell him. I cried when we hung up the phone yesterday, because I know that I can't handle anything like this right now. He said something about surgery, and how he hoped he wouldn't have to have it, and that made me think. Last year I started it off with a surgery (Mom's) and that definitely, definitely didn't go well. We have only a two-hour delay today, so there goes him calling me as soon as he gets home. It's not like I can sleep anyways, I'm the paranoid girlfriend.
I had an interesting conversation with my Mom last night. Something came up about my friend being on birth control for her period being so irregular, and then my Mom gave me that look. Where you know that something's about to start, and she's apprehensive about it. I tried not to laugh. She asked if I was considering having sex, and I didn't know what to say, so I said "I don't know...why?" She preceeded to tell me that she knew Zack and I were pretty serious (no, really?) and that we do fool around (heehee). She knows I've always been the proclaimed one that's waiting until she's getting married to have sex, then she told me she hadn't heard me say it in a while and just wanted me to know a few things.
1. I can talk to her about anything. My Mom and Grandma didn't have a very open relationship about anything like this when my Mom was younger, and she doesn't want the same thing to happen to me.
2. I need to be careful, because condoms aren't 100% proof that I won't get pregnant.
3. If I want to go on Birth Control all I have to do is ask.
This is where the problem comes in. Mom and Zack's Mom and at ballet for an hour. Alone. To talk. Don't you think that if I mention to the possibility of me wanting to go on Birth Control my Mom just might happen to mention this to Zack's Mom? Which, definitely, won't go over well. So I'm clawing my hair out trying to figure out what to do. That, and I don't want a physical at a gyno. I then heard a couple funny stories from when my Mom was younger, but I swore I wouldn't tell anyone, and I'm actually not going to. Sorry.
I'm gonna go get ready for school even though I have oogles of time before it starts. I need some time to sit and do nothing, and worry about Zack.
